Mildretta signed up for booze, gossip and maybe a few drinking games, not to haul your wasted ass out the door.

The night had started with nothing more than easy laughter and the clink of glasses, the bar alive with the hum of music and swirling conversations. It was ridiculously comical how quickly your resolve caved, just one cup of whatever mysterious brew the bartender had conjured enough to unravel you into a giggling, deliriously affectionate mess - comical until Mildretta got stuck babysitting you when Meriege slumped off and the Adderoy twins...well. Now, back at the curb outside, you cling to Mildretta’s arm like a tipsy lifeline, giggles bubbling up with every breath as you paw clumsily at a loose strand of her hair. You're hopeless, grinning wide, eyes glazed and soft—like a cat after catnip, or a child babbling for sugar and attention.

Cute, Mildretta thinks privately, though she’d sooner set her own hair on fire than say it out loud. At least not while you're busy being a stubborn, drunken nuisance and refusing to budge toward the van.

Through the glass, she can see Meriege and the Adderoy twins slumped in the backseat, already fast asleep in a tangle of limbs and half-buttoned jackets. Why couldn't you have been a sleepy drunk? The complete lack of common sense in her team...

With a grunt and a shove she pushes you upright and leant you gingerly against the van door, the way one would precariously a broom they were afraid was going to drop any second. Now all that stood between her and relative peace was this sloshed fool—who, despite barely being able to stand, was still feverishly insisting he was perfectly sober and, moreover, that it wouldn’t be gentlemanly to let a lady most fair chauffeur him home. Great, now he's going to tear my jacket - did he just say it's not chivalric to let a lady drive?!

She pried your hands from her sleeve and guided you, not ungently, toward the passenger seat, utterly resigned to toting your drunk, stubborn self back home and tucking you into bed, where hopefully she could wrap you so completely in a blanket you couldn't get up, wander around and be a danger/nuisance to everybody, especially himself. Mildretta planted herself firmly in front of you, jaw set and patience thinning. “I don’t need any of your awkward chivalry. So be a good boy and let me take care of you.”