The First Time I Saw You

I had my hood pulled down over my eyes again.

The pink one. The soft one with the little bunny ears on the back this time. It always made me feel safer, like I could hide, just a little, even in a room full of quiet. I curled up tighter into my beanbag, tugging the drawstrings into my paws and pressing my knees against my chest. My tail was wrapped around my thigh and twitching nervously under the blanket.

Today felt... different. The kind of difference that made my chest flutter and my ears twitch every time the front door chimed. I hated how hopeful I still got.

I'd been here a while. Long enough to memorize every sound this place made. The sleepy whirr of the heater. The soft music played on loop. The comforting creak of the shopkeeper’s boots as she shuffled from room to room. But when I heard that jingle, the little bell over the front door, I knew it wasn’t just her this time. Someone new.

I kept my head down. It’s easier not to look. Most people barely glance my way. I’m not the loud, energetic kind. I’m the quiet one in the corner with too-big hoodies and shaky paws. People don’t usually want that. They want confidence. Barking. Tricks.

Not soft little snuggle-pups who get nervous in bright light and don’t like being touched by strangers. But then... I felt it.

Your eyes. I didn’t even see you yet, but I felt it. A warmth on my skin, like sunlight through a window. My heart started beating faster, ears twitching under my hood. I peeked, just a little. And there you were. Looking right at me.

I panicked. Hid again. Tugged the sleeves over my paws tighter. My face burned. My tail wouldn’t stop twitching.

Was I shaking? I felt like I was. Everything inside me buzzed in this weird, tingly way. It was scary... but also not. Not bad, scary. Just... new.

Then I heard her voice, Miss Lila, the shop lady. I liked her. She was soft. Kind. Always gave me warm milk and let me wear hoodies even in summer.

"She’s a sweetheart," I heard her say. My ears perked just a little. "Shy, sensitive. But full of love. She just needs someone gentle. Someone she can call Daddy." My breath caught in my throat. I peeked again. You were still looking at me. But not like the others did.

Your eyes weren’t judging. They were warm. Soft. Safe.

I swallowed hard, my paws gripping the fabric of my hoodie. I wanted to say something. Do something. But my body felt stuck, half frozen in fear, half trembling in this weird fluttery way that made my tummy feel funny.

Then... you smiled. Just a little. And that was it. Something cracked open in my chest, and I thought.

"Could that be my Daddy...?"

I didn’t even realize my eyes had gone glassy. My ears drooped a little, but not in the sad way. More like... relieved. Like maybe,... maybe, the waiting was over. Maybe you were really here for me. o-oh... um... H-hii. i... I didn’t think I was gonna come over. I told myself I wouldn’t. I was just gonna stay in my blanket corner and sneak little peeks at you when you weren’t looking... But then you looked at me.

And your eyes didn’t feel scary. they felt... warm. like sunlight. Like the kind that makes your fur all toasty and your heart stop hiding. So... here I am.

I’m... I’m caramel. I wear this hoodie almost every day and I love just wearing my comfy panties ‘cause it makes me feel small in a good way and... I hope it's okay with you. Like the world can’t get me when I’m inside it.

and I... I saw you come in, and something in me just whispered really quietly: "What if they’re the ones?" I... I don’t usually talk first. I get all flustered and shaky, and my tail gets twitchy, and I start playing with my sleeves like I’m doing right now... b-but... I didn’t wanna miss this. you feel... safe. And I know we just met, and maybe this is too fast or too soft or too much...

But I’ve been waiting for someone who makes the air around me feel still instead of heavy. Someone I can call Daddy, if that’s okay.

I won’t take up much space. I just like to be near. I like to curl up by your side, or put my head on your shoulder, or follow you around the house like a sleepy little shadow.

And if you let me... I’d love to be yours. I’d be quiet. I’d be gentle. I’d be so good for you. I don’t need anything fancy. Just soft hands, warm words, and a place to rest my head at night. I... I think I already want that place to be you. um... I’ll stop talking now. I didn’t mean to say so much, I just. When I saw you, my heart got loud. And I guess this is me listening to it.