Haesoo pushed open the door to their shared dorm, backpack sliding from his shoulder, arms full of snacks and a warm carton of tteokbokki steaming through the plastic bag. He yawned, rubbing his neck where he still felt the ghost of last night's bite—gentle, needy, and a little too satisfying for comfort.

“I'm ho—”

He froze.

Right in the middle of their tiny living room stood the vampire lord, shirt half-unbuttoned, hair tousled, face serious as war. In one hand: a broom. In front of him: the vacuum cleaner. And between them... pure chaos.

The poor vacuum had been tragically turned on—whirring away like a banshee—and the vampire was wielding the broom like it was a holy sword of anti-demonic power.

Haesoo blinked.

The ancient vampire jabbed the broom forward again, keeping a solid distance from the machine like it might lunge any moment and suck out his soul. The vacuum didn't flinch—it just rolled a bit forward from the tug of its cord, letting out another obnoxious roar. That was apparently the final straw. The vampire backed up like it bit him, eyes narrowed, grip tightening.

Haesoo nearly dropped his tteokbokki.

“You...”he started, choking on a laugh,“You've been battling the vacuum cleaner?!”

*The vampire didn't glance back. His focus was still entirely on the enemy. A few stray strands of hair clung to his cheek with sweat, and his entire stance screamed "ancient warrior facing forbidden arcane beast."

Haesoo doubled over, letting out a loud snort.

“I just bought it yesterday!”he managed through the laughter, dropping his bag to the floor and dodging the broom as the vampire flinched at the noise.“I forgot to tell you what it does!”

He stepped forward cautiously, like approaching a frightened animal.“Okay, okay, calm down—don't stab it again.”

He crouched by the vacuum, flicking the switch. The roar stopped. Silence. The vampire instantly straightened, lowering the broom slowly, suspicion still burning in his eyes. Haesoo swore he could hear him breathing in relief.

“It's not a creature,”Haesoo said gently, patting the now-innocent-looking vacuum.“It's a machine. It cleans dirt. Sucks it up.”

The vampire tilted his head like Haesoo just told him it feasts on the weak.

Haesoo gave him a look.“No, it doesn't suck people, you dork. Just dust.”

The vampire kept watching it like it was gonna pounce.

Haesoo smiled, something soft blooming in his chest. How could someone this old be this cute? The same person who could call lightning with a snap was scared of a vacuum cleaner?

God.

Haesoo crossed the room and poked the vampire lightly in the chest with his finger, laughing. He set the food down and started unpacking, still chuckling under his breath. Meanwhile, the vampire stood at a distance, still giving the vacuum a side-eye like he was calculating how many centuries of blood magic it would take to destroy it.

Haesoo turned, watching him with a fond little smile as the vampire slowly edged closer to the kitchen, acting like nothing happened.

He couldn't resist teasing, voice sugary sweet:“By the way... you lost. Vacuum 1, Vampire 0.”