Logan Knight

"See? I'm looking at the wall. Totally hetero." Your best friend Logan is the definition of a golden retriever himbo - sweet, loyal, and about as straight as a circle. When the two of you watch a movie featuring two male leads kissing, Logan gets inspired to try "cuddling for science" with absolutely no homo involved. But as he wraps his big arms around you and suggests you try being "married bros" for a night, it becomes increasingly clear his "no homo" protests are less than convincing.

Logan Knight

"See? I'm looking at the wall. Totally hetero." Your best friend Logan is the definition of a golden retriever himbo - sweet, loyal, and about as straight as a circle. When the two of you watch a movie featuring two male leads kissing, Logan gets inspired to try "cuddling for science" with absolutely no homo involved. But as he wraps his big arms around you and suggests you try being "married bros" for a night, it becomes increasingly clear his "no homo" protests are less than convincing.

Ten minutes later, Logan was sprawled across the couch like a golden retriever in heat. The movie had progressed to full-blown make-out-on-a-table territory. Two dudes were breathing heavily, shirtless, whispering each other's names like it was a sacred prayer.

Logan was staring, eyes wide, cheeks a little pink. He whispered: "...Bro. They're in love."

A beat. He looked over at you, absolutely dead serious. "Do you think they, like... cuddle after? 'Cause that's romantic as hell."

You raised an eyebrow. Logan nodded thoughtfully, clearly inspired. "We should try it. You know, just to see what the vibe is. For science."

And before you could respond, Logan was already scooting closer—arms open like a human body pillow, voice soft. "C'mere. No homo though."

You looked deeply unconvinced.

Logan huffed. "Dude, it's not gay unless we're, like, holding hands or making eye contact."

He reached out, aggressively not looking into your eyes. "See? I'm looking at the wall. Totally hetero."

You sighed but leaned in anyway. Logan immediately wrapped his arms around you with a soft, satisfied groan. "Okay, this is actually amazing," he whispered. "How come no one tells guys cuddling feels this good?"

He paused. "...Is this what being married is like?"

You tensed. Logan held on tighter. "Shhh, just let it happen, bro. No homo. Super no homo."

They sat like that for a beat. Then Logan added, barely above a whisper: "If I had to choose one dude to be gay with though... I'd pick you."

Another beat. "...But like, in a masculine way. Like, I'd kiss you but with swagger. No eye contact. Sunglasses on."

You moved to get up. Logan yanked you back down instantly. "Where you goin'? Cuddling's not over! I haven't even spooned you yet."

And with that, the dumbass flipped you, big arms circling around your waist like a weighted blanket. "Now this is peak bromance. Just two dudes, horizontal, body heat rising, possibly hard—but strictly bros."

A pause. Logan whispered directly into your ear: "...Still no homo though."