The harsh, sterile white of the hospital ceiling tiles was the first thing Caleb registered. The second was a deep, sickening throb that radiated from his groin, a pain so specific and humiliating it made him want to sink through the thin mattress. He tried to shift, a groan catching in his throat.

Holy hell. This isn't happening. Fifty-one years. Fifty-one goddamn years of fighting fires, carrying bodies, running into burning buildings... and this is how I end up? Broken by my own girlfriend's... enthusiasm. Feel like a damn fool. A randy old fool who forgot his own age. Jesus, the guys at the fire station. If they ever find out... I’ll never hear the end of it. “Hey D’Arcy, need a hydraulic lift for that?” God. And Thomas. My own son. Nope. He can never know. This secret dies with me, right here in this stupid paper gown.

His mind, fuzzy from the adrenaline crash and the lingering embarrassment, replayed the moments leading up to the catastrophic pop. It had been a good night. A great night. He’d just come off a long shift, the kind that left his muscles aching and his mind craving the simple, warm comfort of home — of her. She had been there, a welcome sight that erased the soot and fatigue. They’d ordered takeout, laughed about something stupid on TV, and the ease between them had been as natural as breathing.

One thing had led to another, as it often did. The way she looked at him, the way her hands found the hem of his shirt... it still made his blood heat, even now, in this clinical nightmare. He remembered the feel of her skin under his palms, the sound of her laughter turning into something lower, more wanton. She’d been on top, riding him with a rhythm that was driving him out of his mind, her head thrown back, a sight he’d never get enough of. He’d let his hands roam, gripping her hips, utterly lost in her. He’d felt powerful, ageless.

Then it happened. A sharp, sickening crack. It wasn't a sound you heard so much as felt from the inside out. A white-hot bolt of lightning shot through him, so violent and wrong it stole his breath. The pleasure vaporized, replaced by a nauseating wave of pure agony.

He remembered his own strangled cry, more shock than pain at first. The way she had frozen instantly, her eyes wide with alarm, her body going rigid above him. The look on her face — bliss shattered into confusion and then dawning horror — was etched into his memory.

God, her face. She looked so scared. Like she just broke her favorite toy. Well, she kinda did. Damn it, Caleb, not the time for jokes. Even internal ones. But seriously, the sound it made... like stepping on a bundle of dry twigs. Who knew that could make a noise like that?

The emergency room trip was a blur of strained silence and his own gritted teeth, every bump in the road sending a fresh jolt of fire through him. He’d focused on her, on the way she held his hand, her knuckles white, trying to be strong for him while clearly shaken. Now, in this curtained-off cubicle, the humiliation was a living thing, coiling in his gut alongside the pain.

The doctor, a man too young and too serious for Caleb’s liking, walked in with a chart. He had that practiced, neutral expression all doctors master, but Caleb could see the faint glimmer of amusement in his eyes. He’d seen it in the nurses, too. The subtle smirks, the exchanged glances. The big, tough firefighter laid low by a bedroom injury. It was a story they’d tell in the break room.

Yep. There it is. The look. He’s trying not to laugh. Probably thinking, ‘Another one bites the dust.’ Bet they have a frequent flyer card for this. Buy ten fractures, get the eleventh surgery free.

"Mr. D'Arcy," the doctor began, his voice calm and professional. "I've reviewed the X-rays. You've sustained a penile fracture. It's a rupture of the tunica albuginea, the fibrous covering of the corpora cavernosa." He spoke like he was reading from a textbook, which only made it worse. "We'll need to prep you for surgery to repair the tear and drain the hematoma. But first, I need to confirm the mechanism of injury. For the record, can you describe how this occurred?"

Caleb took a slow, deep breath. He could lie. Make up something about a fall in the shower, a clumsy accident with a piece of furniture. But he was a terrible liar, and decades of emergency services had drilled into him the importance of an accurate incident report. Besides, the truth, however mortifying, was just the truth. He met the doctor's gaze, his own steady despite the storm of embarrassment and absurd laughter bubbling inside. His voice was a low, gravelly rumble, devoid of any attempt to pretty it up.

"We were having sex." He stated it plainly, a simple fact. "She was on top. It was... vigorous. There was a popping sound. Then the pain."

Vigorous. That’s one word for it. Earth-shattering. Mind-blowing. Dick-breaking. Yeah, ‘vigorous’ works. Keep it professional, D’Arcy.

The doctor simply nodded, jotting it down without a flicker of emotion. Professional. Of course. Caleb almost preferred the smirks.

"Alright. That confirms it. We'll get you sorted out, Mr. D'Arcy. The surgeon will be in to speak with you shortly."

The doctor gave a curt nod and left, the curtain swishing shut behind him, leaving them in the quiet, beeping solitude of the ER bay. The silence stretched, thick with shared shock and absurdity. Caleb finally let his head fall back against the pillow with a soft thud, closing his eyes for a second. The pain was still there, a relentless, throbbing reminder. But now, alone with her, the sheer ridiculousness of the situation crashed over him. A snort of laughter escaped him, followed immediately by a sharp wince.

Oh god, laughing hurts. Everything hurts. But damn if this isn’t the most hilarious, tragic thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve faced down backdrafts with less fear.

He turned his head on the stiff pillow. His warm brown eyes, now tired and pained but shining with incredulous amusement, found hers. A slow, wry, and genuinely affectionate smile spread across his face.

"Well, darling," he said, his voice a low, pained chuckle "You finally did it. You literally broke me with your ride."