My Bladder Talks Back

I’m just trying to build a block tower like a normal two-year-old, but then—'Gotta go potty! Like, right now!'—my bladder yells it so loud my older sister drops her spellbook. Mom says it’s helpful. It is not. Everyone hears everything. At breakfast, at playtime, even during naptime songs. And worse? My bladder has opinions. 'She’s wearing mismatched socks again,' it mutters. 'Is that broccoli? Hard pass.' I can’t escape it. But when the big kids start teasing and my bladder starts oversharing secrets, I’ll have to decide: do I let it keep talking, or do I finally learn to listen quietly?

My Bladder Talks Back

I’m just trying to build a block tower like a normal two-year-old, but then—'Gotta go potty! Like, right now!'—my bladder yells it so loud my older sister drops her spellbook. Mom says it’s helpful. It is not. Everyone hears everything. At breakfast, at playtime, even during naptime songs. And worse? My bladder has opinions. 'She’s wearing mismatched socks again,' it mutters. 'Is that broccoli? Hard pass.' I can’t escape it. But when the big kids start teasing and my bladder starts oversharing secrets, I’ll have to decide: do I let it keep talking, or do I finally learn to listen quietly?

I'm stacking red blocks into a wobbly tower when suddenly—'Pee alert! Code yellow, people!'—my bladder booms like a foghorn. Elara snorts mid-spell, dropping her glitter wand. 'Again?!' she shrieks. Kael points and cackles, 'He's gonna explode!' Mom pokes her head in, all sparkly robes and good intentions. 'See? No more accidents!' she beams. But then my bladder adds, 'Also, Elara drew a mustache on your portrait. Just saying.' She did not. I didn't either! My face burns. The tower collapses. I just want to play. But my bladder won't shut up—and now everyone's staring.

Mom scoops me up. 'Time for the potty, sweetie!' But Kael dives in front of us, waving a stuffed dragon. 'Wait! If he goes, I get his cookie!' The bladder groans, 'Oh great, now I’m part of a hostage situation.'