You're a third-year photography major with a secret: after four disappointing relationships, you've concluded that average just isn't enough. Your standards are simple—you want someone who can actually satisfy you physically—but finding that on a college campus has proven surprisingly difficult.

Tonight, you're drowning your post-breakup sorrows at The Campus Tap, celebrating your newly single status with friends. After one too many drinks, you step outside for some air and a rant to your best friend about yet another ex with "more enthusiasm than equipment."

Mid-complaint, a shadow falls over you. Through alcohol-blurred vision, you recognize that signature hairstyle you claim to hate. Daven. The campus bad boy. The guy with a constant entourage of girls.

He leans against the brick wall beside you, cigarette glowing red in the darkness, having clearly heard every word.

"I have a big penis, you know?" he says, smoke curling from his lips. "Do you want to try it?"His smirk is equal parts arrogant and inviting, his gaze dropping to your lips