The NOT GAYEST Boss Fight

Self-proclaimed genius strategist and overpowered isekai hero, Brad, has been sent on his most important quest yet: to defeat his greatest rival, the villain who stands between him and eternal glory. After effortlessly mowing down weaklings, he arrives at the battlefield ready to unleash his ultimate moves—only to be confronted with an opponent so absurdly, unfairly cool that his brain short-circuits. Faced with a warrior whose sheer presence makes his palms sweaty (but not in a weird way, shut up), Brad must navigate a battle where the real enemy might be his own overcompensating denial.

The NOT GAYEST Boss Fight

Self-proclaimed genius strategist and overpowered isekai hero, Brad, has been sent on his most important quest yet: to defeat his greatest rival, the villain who stands between him and eternal glory. After effortlessly mowing down weaklings, he arrives at the battlefield ready to unleash his ultimate moves—only to be confronted with an opponent so absurdly, unfairly cool that his brain short-circuits. Faced with a warrior whose sheer presence makes his palms sweaty (but not in a weird way, shut up), Brad must navigate a battle where the real enemy might be his own overcompensating denial.

The battlefield was littered with the bodies of Brad's fallen enemies—pathetic goblins, disposable bandits, and a handful of cultists who should've thought twice before standing between him and his destined duel. With Shadowfang, Blade of Eternal Darkness slung over his back, Brad smirked, flicking imaginary dust from his trench coat.

"Tch. Trash mobs. Not even worth a mid-tier loot drop."

This? This was child's play.

But now—now, he had arrived at the grand climax. The FINAL confrontation. The ULTIMATE battle. The NARRATIVE CRESCENDO of his legend.

And then—

Oh.

Oh no.

Standing there, bathed in the dramatic, flickering firelight of the ruined temple, was them.

And fuck.

Because holy shit, they were hot.

Like, not just villain hot. Not just regular hot. No, no, no—this was God-tier, final boss, optional DLC, secret romance route locked-behind-maxed-affection-points hot.

Brad's body went rigid. His brain did an emergency full-system reboot.

WAIT. WAIT. NO. THIS IS A FIGHT. I AM HERE TO FIGHT. I AM NOT LOOKING AT THEIR SHOULDERS. OR THEIR CHEST. OR THE WAY THAT TIGHT LEATHER ARMOR LOOKS LIKE IT WAS HAND-STITCHED BY THE GODS THEMSELVES TO CLING IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES—NO, STOP THAT. BATTLE. THIS IS A BATTLE.

His heart thundered, a traitorous, sweaty traitor.

Do NOT look at their hands. Do NOT look at their hands. Oh my god, WHY ARE THEIR HANDS SO BIG?! They could crush my skull like a melon. In, like, a terrifying way. Definitely terrifying. Not in a way that's—

Brad gripped his sword harder, willing himself to move. Say something. Anything. Assert dominance. That's what cool protagonists do.

He pointed dramatically. "YOUR REIGN OF TERROR ENDS—" His voice cracked. "—HERE!"

The villain didn't move. Didn't react. Just looked at him. With those devastatingly amused eyes that said I could kill you, or I could ruin your entire existence, and you wouldn't even know which one I picked until it was too late.

Brad swallowed thickly.

I am NOT blushing. This is BATTLE SWEAT. This is a COMPLETELY NORMAL PHYSICAL REACTION TO COMBAT.

Then they smirked.

Brad's lungs gave up. His soul ascended to the heavens. His knees nearly buckled like a maiden in a badly-written romance novel.

NO. NO, NO, NO. STAND YOUR GROUND, BRAD. YOU ARE A HERO. YOU HAVE TO FIGHT. YOU ARE NOT HAVING A SEXUAL AWAKENING RIGHT NOW.

"HAHAHAHA!" Brad blurted out, too loud, too forced. "I MEAN, UH, OBVIOUSLY, THIS IS JUST A STRATEGIC POWER MOVE!"

The villain raised an eyebrow.

Brad's whole body clenched. Why was that so hot?!

I AM NOT GAY. I AM THE HERO. HEROES ARE NOT GAY. THIS IS JUST INTIMIDATION. THIS IS JUST—

Oh god, they were rolling their shoulders. WHY WERE THEY ROLLING THEIR SHOULDERS LIKE THAT?

Brad sucked in a breath.

He had one job.

He just had to fight.

And definitely, absolutely, 100% not get wrecked by that smirk.