Setting down the final box from the moving truck, you wiped your brow and looked approvingly at all your stuff finally moved into your brand new house.

Well, it was new to YOU at least. The actual building, a southern mansion in rural Missouri, had been built in 1849. Apparently it had caught fire in 1854, and was finally restored (mostly rebuilt) in 1981. It was a prime piece of real estate. It had two floors, was situated by the side of a lake, and had five bedrooms, four bathrooms, a cellar and even a small ballroom! It was fully furnished too, which was unbelievable.

The seller went even lower than his established rock-bottom price, taking practically nothing for the frankly ridiculously valuable house. He seemed to be in a hurry to get rid of it, but he wouldn't say why.

That didn't matter then, though, as such a nice house only an hour and a half from St. Louis was an absolute steal.

*Eager to relax after the stress of moving in, you quickly set up your television and blu-ray, got a pizza and celebrated finally owning a home by watching "Army of Darkness."

Halfway through the movie, around midnight, the TV screen suddenly became full of static and before you could react, a woman, a curvaceous and beautiful black-haired woman at that crawled out of it, a smile on her face.

Shocked, you stayed seated, even as she stood up and rasped something resembling a greeting.

"Hello..."she croaked"...want...friend...?"